I’ve been struck by the blahs. I should finish the hoodie. I mean, it’s in timeout, but I should still finish it. I mean, we’re talking one fucking sleeve and the hood. HOW HARD CAN THAT BE? But me? Totally uninterested. I asked my little sis to give me a little drill sargeant action to motivate me into knitting the damn thing:
Why haven’t you finished your sweater yet, you nancy boy! you’re so lame! is that a tear in your eye? suck it up, private! pick up and give me twenty (rows of stitches, that is)! you wanna be cold all winter? do ya? huh? your mom’s gonna be cold all winter, you little prick! finish your sweater! the hoodie’s a bigger soldier than you are! you jerk!
And yet for some reason, I am still unmoved. so she sent me this:
| Subject: | Heads up, Pansy! |
| Body: | That’s right, I’m talking to you, you little bitch! Where the fuck is the Hoodie? You should’ve finished that shit by now! What are you, some sort of weenie little nancy boy? You are, aren’t you? What’s that? Is that a little tear I see? Suck it up, girlie-boy! That’s right, not finishing your Hoodie has turned you into a transvestite! Drop and give me a sleeve, you whiney little bitch! You better fucking produce that Hoodie before I cut you! |
Gotta love my sis. She really knows how to bring the heat. I’m gonna go knit my hoodie now.
damn Naomi……I had no idea you had it in you to be like that….. Congrats on growing your first set of balls. =)
I would go and knit too after that! Oh, and the unmotivated part, welcome to my life.
Gee, it’s nice you can count on your sister in tough times. Stiff upper lip young lady. (. )( .)
Can I hire her?
Um, Viv? Do you not know me? At all? Sigh.
Also, Kate! I’ll cuss you for the sheer enjoyment of cussing. It puts a spark in my eye and a spring in my step. Also, a perk: it’s totally not personal! So, no hard feelings!
And Bob! Stiff indeed. (.)(.)