Baby Hat(e)

This seemingly innocent little baby hat(e) was crafted from some of the most hateful yarn I have ever had the displeasure to work with. And I really have only myself to blame. And maybe some yarn fumes. And also the siren call of the colorway.

So there was this little baby that got born as babies are wont to do. And I decided that this particular little baby needed a jacket. So I went to the yarn store in search of some pretty yarn to make this baby a jacket. And I was set on a variegated yarn because, well, I get bored easily and variegated yarn tends to hold my attention. Noro was the only yarn that was speaking to me, and this particular Taiyo yarn enthralled me to bits. It’s softer than Kureyon and more affordable than some other Noro yarns that will remain unnamed.

There was just this one teensy little problem. And that problem’s name is COTTON. I hate knitting with cotton. Cotton yarn is the bane of my existence! We are SWORN ENEMIES! But the wool and silk and other fibers assured me that they would keep the cotton under control. It was only 40% cotton. Which really, when you think about it, is less than half! I wouldn’t even notice it was there! The yarn assured me smooth sailing with its pretty colors and less than half cotton content. I was so torn. The colors were just perfect! But the cotton! Would it be all right? I mean, really all right? I just didn’t know what to do!

So I bought two skeins.

And then I proceeded to start and restart the same baby jacket over and over again. No matter what I did, the cotton was there! And noticeable! and HATEFUL. And fighting me every step of the way! It made me constantly mess up what I was doing and just refused to cooperate. I’m fairly certain that it changed the pattern on me several times when I wasn’t looking.

After much fighting and quickly getting nowhere, I decided that I would make a peace offering and knit a little hat(e) with the yarn to show that I was willing to make that first diplomatic step towards peace. And, that’s as far as it got. The yarn still refused to cooperate with me when it came to the jacket. And can I just say? It was no cake walk knitting that little hat(e). The cotton was EVER present through the whole process.It was at this point, with time running short on supply that I made an executive decision and banished the yarn to a dark corner of my yarn cabinet.

I then appropriated some handspun stash yarn and started a new jacket. In a matter of 4 days, I knit up a baby jacket. I did, however, have to use two different colorways of handspun since I didn’t have quite enough of either to make one whole sweater. Still, I think the resulting jacket turned out quite well under the circumstances. All that is left is the blocking and the buttons, which will be done tonight.

And thus I have learned, yet again, that cotton and I do not mix when it comes to knitting.

I have this friend who has a wee bairn in her belly and she maybe sometimes read this blog, so I am telling you right now that this may or may not be in reference to said wee bairn. Maybe.

I am knitting something that is baby sized and can I just ask? WHY HAVE I NOT DONE THIS BEFORE? Baby knitting is so gratifying! A whole sweater in a WEEK! How awesome is that? A hat in an evening? Booties in a few hours? I am an idiot. It is the perfect fusion of instant gratification and knitting a garment that is not a scarf.

Also? Scarf knitting? NOT instant gratification. Unless you?re knitting a bulky yarn scarf on size 15 needles. But I don?t swing that way, so no. instant. gratification. Poo!

So, anyway, I am knitting this sweater that may or may not fit a wee bairn (also, I love saying wee bairn. Sometimes I like to pretend that I?m Scottish, because if it?s not Scottish, it?s crap!) and I got all pissy yesterday because maybe I missed a SSK somewhere. I was all melodramatic and very Anne of Green Gables about my extra stitch. You know, ?I AM IN THE DEPTHS OF DESPAIR!? and whatnot and was about to put the damn thing in time-out when I realized that, ?Hey! This half of the right front that I messed up? It took me maybe half of one whole episode of Doctor Who to knit. I think I can tink it back and redo it.? And lo and behold, it was so.

Now all I have left are two little sleeves, some seaming, a collar and buttons. And they happen to be the cutest buttons in the world. Normally, this would seem daunting and a lot to accomplish in a short period of time, but it?s all wee and tiny! I will be done in no time flat.

Wee knits are awesome.