Ok, so let’s take a little trip into the psychosis of my life, also known as as my mother. I avoid as much direct contact as possible with this woman because she makes me insane. This might make me sound like a bad person, but I don’t care. If she was your mother, you might feel the same way. However, I will give you a little background information. My mother never calls me to talk or to see how I’m doing or just to catch up. She ONLY calls me when she wants something. I stopped calling her for this reason. Apparently, she thinks that my purpose in life is to seve her and her needs. This is why I was bred. So, it’s Monday and it is MONDAY. Queen Mom calls me at 10:50 a.m. on my cell phone. Generally, when you’re at work and a parent calls you on your cell phone, and you’re me, you get a little panicky because you would think it would be an emergency. And in her mind, it was an emergency.
The following is an actual conversation between my mother and me that happened TODAY:
Me: Hello? Mama? (worried)
Mom: Hey…can you do me a favor?
Me: What? (a little angry)
Mom: ….silence….
Me: What? What do you want me to do?
Mom: Are you ok? You sound upset.
Me: I’m at work and I’m busy. What do you want?
Mom: Can you call [your ex] and ask him for the suit that I gave him? I think it’s too good for him to keep and I want it back so I can give it to my brother.
Me: WHAT?
Mom: It’s a Christian Dior…..
Me: Mom, you want me to what?
Mom: ….I could call him….
Me: Yes, you can. Do you have his number?
Mom: No…can you give it to me?
Me: YES.
So I gave her his number and she says bye and hangs up.
WTF????? WHY???????????? What the hell is wrong with her?
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