So, here I am, almost completely finished and that lying, cheating, downright no good floozy went and started on another project. All that’s left is the Kitchener stitch and I’m done! But does she care? NO! She just goes off just as she pleases right on to the next project like I don’t even exist! Like our time together meant NOTHING to her! She’s a cruel, heartless bitch, that one.
And she’s not discreet about her new affair either, just flinging him IN MY FACE. She didn’t even try to hide it when she was winding up the yarn in front of me. Like I wouldn’t notice…or mind. That BITCH! Well, I showed her! I put a hex on her knitting that other project before finishing me.
Oh yeah, I have no shame. I put a great hex on her and that other project. A hat. Please. Like she can be satisfied by a hat. Anyway, I heard her grumbling when she came home about having to count her cast on stitches a gazillion times and then not getting the ribbing right and having to start over and then more counting a gazillion times. Gee, I wonder why that happened? But the kicker? The reason I know the hex worked? She cast on with the wrong size needles and has to start over AGAIN. That’s right! Don’t mess with an unfinished sock because I will go all voodoo on your ass! Let that be a lesson, biatch!
Be careful with those hexes, Sock. Gaby put a hex on Michael, the library dude, and now he’s having really strange luck with the ladies. The worst part is that Gaby can’t remember how to take off the hex!
Dude…you better finish that sock before it kills you in your sleep. That sock has -attitude-.
Better keep your socks away from my socks…I don’t want my sweet, impressionable socks getting any ideas.