32/365: Knocked Up

I just showed you something I peed on. How gross is that?

In case you can’t tell, that is a faint positive line on that home pregnancy test. I took this test Monday and once it sunk in, I took the picture. Because, how can you not document something like that? Can I just tell you something? I had a work function Monday morning, February 1, that required me to be at work at 6:30 a.m. This means, I had to get up at 4:30 a.m. in order to get ready and to work on time. Trying to pee on a stick at 4:30 a.m.? MORE DIFFICULT THAN NORMAL. But that sucker turned positive as soon as it got wet. And it took me all 3 minutes the test requires to understand that I was not seeing things that early in the morning.

So, of course, I did what any sane person would do and woke B up to confirm what I was looking at. He took one look at it and went, “Yup. You’re pregnant.” And then pulled me into a big bear hug. Me? I just looked at him and said, “Ok. Thanks. I’m gonna get in the shower now.”

What? It was 4:30 A.M. I don’t function well that early in the morning.

So anyway, I called the Infertility Clinic during lunch to set up an appointment and when I talked to the nurse, she was amazed at how calm I was about the news. I told her that it was 4:30 a.m. when I did the test and I wasn’t sure I did it right and as far as I was concerned, it wasn’t official until they made it official. She just laughed at me and gave me my appointment time.

Which was yesterday morning. I get there and she tells me that I’ve got to pee in a cup and then bring it out to her and have a seat while she does a pregnancy test. Can I just tell you something? Sitting next to your cup of pee and making small talk with someone while they’re sticking a dropper in your cup of pee to drip your pee on a pregnancy test? AWKWARD. Well, the pee dropper pregnancy test was positive, so she took another vial of blood and they checked my levels to let me know how I was doing. My levels are phenomenal, thanks for asking. Everything looks good. And I am definitely knocked up.

We sat BAD Boy down last night and told him that we were definitely not getting another dog (another long story), but we did get him something else instead. And offered to show him a picture since it hadn’t gotten here yet. And showed him this. (Go look. I’ll wait.) The look of shock and pure delight on his face was priceless. He was over the moon. The first thing he wanted to do? Call his cousin and rub it in her face (she’s an only child, too). That conversation went like this:

BB: Hey! Guess what?

GC: What?

BB: (in a sing song voice) I’m gonna be  a big bro-ther!

So charming. But if I were in his place, I can’t say I wouldn’t do the same thing. And after that he proceeded to ask to call every member of B’s family that he could think of to tell them he was going to be a big brother.

When he was getting ready to go to bed, he came and told me good night and then waved to my stomach and said, “Good night, It!”

And to top it all off, I got an e-mail from his teacher at 7:53 a.m. congratulating me on the big news and how excited BAD Boy was about it all. Um, y’all? School starts at like 7:45 a.m. I have a feeling that he busted into the classroom and then announced to the whole class that he’s going to be a big brother.

I think BAD Boy might be a little excited.

*I really did take the picture on Day 32.