So today I went and had more blood drawn by the nice vampires. They checked my progesterone to see if I ovulated and released an egg…or from the way things felt, eleventy billion. Minor details.

ANYWAY.

My nurse today told me that they were looking for levels of progesterone at 14 or above. You know, this is a tangent, but I really wish they would tell me the unit of measurement they’re using. I feel so weird saying level of 14. I mean, 14 what? Progesterones? I don’t think they can be their own unit of measurement, can they? /end tangent

So, being the overachiever that I am, I came up with a whopping 41.5 progesterones. Yay me! Now I just have to wait until the end of this cycle to see if I’m pregnant or not which means I have to sit tight for about another week. Which is fine.

Except.

You know how the other day I told you Freddy K. was being a big fat jerk face and trying to claw his way out of my lower abdomen? Well, he’s traveled a little lower. I know, ladies, you’re cringing. And yeah, it’s really that bad. Guys? Just imagine that someone kicked you in the nuts. With steel toed boots. TWICE. IN A ROW. Or just repeatedly. That should about do it as far as understanding what it feels like.

So, I have this ever so slightly unpleasant sensation in my nether regions today that won’t go away and today was the Teacher Appreciation Luncheon at the school. Guess who got to sit with 18 4th graders for an hour and a half? Yeah, that’s right. Me and my Freddy Kruger inflicted vagina. So. Much. Fun.

So to assuage the pain, I met up with a friend I hadn’t seen in ages, caught up with her and bought some yarn. And some super cute bags. It definitely helped me feel better, but didn’t actually help alleviate any of the pain. So I think I have just proved that shopping cannot cure everything. Damn.

So now, I am going to go have a tylenol (or 2) and a lay down and pretend like it’s helping. Yippee.